Anupam Kher: Attitude First, Talent Later

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Award-winning actor Anupam Kher talks about success…..He says, the definition of success keeps changing over years. You can’t have the same definition of success all your life. Success as a struggling actor for me when I was looking for work to get into movies, success for me was becoming an actor. When I became an actor, success for me was getting an award, becoming more successful. So it’s completely different.

Today, for me success is more important to do as a person. To me, success is about not greed; that you should not be greedy. Today, the success for me is to be able to be yourself. Today, the success means to me that you should deal with life simply. And today, success for me is to be able to change people’s lives through my work, through my deeds, through my thoughts.

It’s a very fixed thing to say that this is what success to me is. It’s very difficult for me to describe success. Success is achieving something. Now what do you achieve as a person, as a professional? And success is always related to happiness. But materialistic success, spiritual success, that depends from people to people.

HK: So when people get older, their success become more outside-oriented?

AK: Not with everybody else. People are greedy at the age of 70. In India, there are father-in-laws, mother-in-laws who kill their daughter for money. It depends how evolved you are as a person. It depends from people to people. Age has nothing to do with success or the thought. If that was the case, then we would have had no problems in history.

All the prime ministers and presidents are old. All the dictators are old, so they have not understood the meaning. It is what makes you an evolved person. To me, life is about reinventing yourself. You have to keep reinventing. So that’s what is important.

HK: You teach for many superstars of the future. So I’d like to ask about a key element to be a successful actor?

AK: There is no alternative to honesty and hard work in any profession. That’s what I believe in. You have to be honest and you have to be hard working. There are no short cuts. Short cut successes are for just short term. I’ve been in movies for the last 26 years and done about 400 films. I am still working. If I compare myself with the success of Amitabh Bachchan, then I’m not successful, but if I compare myself with so many people who are wanting to be successful, then I’m a very successful person.

But I have maintained that I have to be hard working and I have to be honest with my profession, and then success will happen to me. It’s a matter of time.

Also, success comes with attitude, not with talent. It’s what your attitude towards life is.

HK: Talent comes later?

AK: Yes, talent comes later. First attitude comes. Attitude gets you work; attitude gets you singled out.

HK: You teach, have a foundation and working for many social goods. Do you have any obligation for that?

AK: No. I want to grow as a person. I want to be rich in my mind. Bill Gates decides to give almost of his wealth. I don’t think he’s giving it only to pay back to the society, that’s what he feels. That’s what makes him happy. Foundation work, I work with mentally challenged children, it makes me happy. I’m doing it for selfish own reasons. You want to feel better. More than anybody else you are doing it for yourself. As I said earlier, life is about growing up. You have to grow up as a person. If you don’t grow up as a person, then how can you grow up as a professional?

HK: That’s true. I came here in India, so I want to ask about Indian philosophy on success.

AK: We are a very young country. We are only 63 years old.

HK: After independence.

AK: Yes. As an independent country we are a young country and we are raring to go; we are raring to prove it. Technology is on our side and the new Internet, mobile, etc., is happening, and the free market has happened. But tradition strangely used to give grounding to the people. I think tradition-wise we are missing on that. People used to chant, people used to sing. Similarly in India, we may be a new country but we have old traditions. Learning and information is very good, but it does not really translate into knowledge. Today’s generation has less sense of wonder; oh my God, life is like that, because everything is at a Google search button.

Today, a 12-year old child can find out everything. But that is information, that is not knowledge. So by the age of 16, you know everything. Then, the frustration comes in. Why are the suicide rates in Japan and other places more among youth people? Because there is no sense of wonder. There is nothing to look forward to. Then you get into drugs, then you get into drinking, then you get into rape, and then you get into all negative things.

I hope that does not happen to India because we are traditionally a very old country, so the grounding, our DNA is very strong. Otherwise, in America. I was recently talking as a motivational speaker. In India if I have a problem, I will tell my boy, the shopkeeper, or whoever like oh, I have a problem, I just can’t sleep these days. Or even I will tell you who I know. We will have somebody to rely on. Bus driver? we will tell our problem. In America, to tell your problem, you have to pay $500 to the person, the psychiatrist. Same thing. Oh, I can’s sleep, man. I can’t sleep. I’ve got this horrible dream. So that idiot is telling the person, and the psychoanalyst is saying, actually, what I think you should do, etc., etc., give me $500. We have no communication left unfortunately. We are not communicating with people. There was a time when people used to communicate with people.

HK: Mmm, it’s really difficult problem. What is the biggest lesson from your total career?

AK: Life is beautiful.

The lesson is life is beautiful. It’s still worth it. It’s amazing to be alive. It’s amazing to chat with somebody. It’s amazing to make a difference in somebody’s life. I’m an optimist. I’m an eternal optimist. To me, life is fantastic. God has been kind to me. God is kind to you. So I think people should be happy.

Sadness is like a drug. The more you become sad the more you want to be sad. And sadness is also personal. Nobody’s interested in your sadness. But if you’re happy, you can make five people happy.

HK: That’s a really great lesson.

AK: And happiness, you have to choose to happen. You have to decide that I want to be happy. Today, if you want to be happy, you say that, okay, from today onwards, from 7th December 2010, sitting with Mr. Kher, I decided to be happy. Then you have to practice that happiness for three months. It’s a practice. Anything happen? No, no, no; I’m happy. I’m happy. Nothing, I’m happy. You say it for three months and you do it for three months, then it becomes a habit.

Like you practice motor driving. You want to learn it so you go to a motor driving school. Then you bang into some car. You do this, but ultimately, you can drive with one hand and do this, and you talk on the phone also, and you flirt also with the other person in the car, because you have practiced it.

HK: Everyone can be happy!

AK: Everybody can be happy. My grandfather used to say that happiness and sadness is in your hands. You can feel very sad by thinking how many people are better than you, but you can feel very happy by thinking how many people are worse than you. You are better than the person who is getting you cup of tea. You are better than him. You are better than person who is driving your bus. But you may say that I’m not better than somebody who has an aircraft.

HK: What’s your advice to be successful in general life?

AK: Follow your dreams and don’t give up. Dreams keep you busy. Dreams do not make you feel miserable. The day you stop dreaming, you are dead. Follow your dreams and reinvent more dreams; not greed, but dreams. Footsteps on the sands of time were not made by sitting down. You have to get up. Footsteps on the sands of time are not made by sitting down. You have to rise. You have to walk. If you try, you risk failure. If you don’t, you ensure it, so you have to try. Today, world is trying to make you feel frightened. This is happening; nuclear power; environments; this issue; that issue. Murder, rape, so you are constantly thinking that I am living in a world which is not safe. Breaking news is always about bad things. It’s never about good things. So your strength is you, not outsiders. If your strength is you, then you have to go in and bring out the strength.

What is your strength? You decided to come to India for one month like that, and there was no plan. You would not take my appointment from Japan. Dear Mr. Kher, I would like to meet you so meet me on so and so date. You took chances, and life is about taking chances. Life is about taking risks. If you live a secure life, if you live a balanced protected life, that’s what you want. But if you want to develop your mind, if you want to do something about life, then you have to take a difficult path. That’s why they say that a bend in the road is not the end of the road.

Anupam Kher is an award-winning actor and working on various projects including foundation and teaching for the future.

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